Addiction Is A Family Disease

It may seem counter-intuitive or even selfish, but finding a way forward from the chaos and pain of addiction for your family starts with getting help for yourself—regardless of whether your loved one seeks treatment for substance abuse.

You've already taken the most important step. You are looking for answers and resources. And you've come to the right place.

Millions of families have been where you are—and they've found a way forward, one day at a time.

How Many Families Suffer from Addiction?

While it’s difficult to calculate the number of families today who suffer from addiction, we know that one in seven Americans will face addiction in their lifetime.* We also know that addiction is an equal opportunity disease, reaching people across age, race, gender and socioeconomic status. So families of all shapes and sizes are affected: from the transitional nuclear family, to single-parent families, step families, foster families and multi-generational families.

Addiction Is a Disease

Addiction has been recognized as a disease by the American Medical Association since 1956. The American Society of Addiction Medicine describes addiction as "a primary, chronic disease of brain reward, motivation, memory and related circuitry." Like other chronic diseases such as diabetes, asthma, and hypertension, addiction often involves cycles of relapse and remission.

We also know that genetics can play a role in the likelihood of developing a substance use disorder. If a parent has alcohol or other drug addiction, his or her child is six times more likely to develop a substance use disorder. So, the disease of addiction can get passed from one generation to the next, which explains why some families may experience addiction and its affects more than others.

The good news is that, like other chronic diseases, addiction can be managed successfully. Most people who go to treatment not only stop using drugs, they also improve their occupational, social and psychological functioning.**

*U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, Office of the Surgeon General, Facing Addiction in America: The Surgeon General’s Report on Alcohol, Drugs, and Health; November 2016.

**Principles of Drug Addiction Treatment (National Institute on Drug Abuse)

How Does Addiction Affect the Family?

Living in the midst of addiction leaves family members feeling traumatized and overwhelmed; they've been lied to and betrayed. There are arguments and confrontations, slamming doors and sleepless nights. Often, there's more serious trouble such as an accident, a lost job or an arrest.

Non-addicted family members tend to over-function, or over-compensate, for the addicted family member. Parents, spouses, children and siblings may play different roles (protector, persecutor, blamer, family hero, mascot, lost child) to survive the stress of substance abuse.

It’s not unusual for parents to become polarized in their parenting styles when trying to cope with their son or daughter’s addict behaviors. They may even blame each other for the problem. Their parenting style typically fall into the following categories:

  • Persecutor - Controlling, angry, distant; believes that punishment will fix problems; may become isolated from the family

  • Protector - Gullible, care taking, enabling behavior; believes that love will fix problems; may become overly enmeshed with the addicted son or daughter

  • Blamer - Avoids taking responsibility by scapegoating and projecting blame onto others

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